he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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