It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
do herpes really smell.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
