Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
now i know why i became what i already was.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
