Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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