Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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