I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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