Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
