i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize
