I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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