My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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