She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
