Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize