Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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