so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
