Those balls look pretty dangerous.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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