Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
