You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Terrible idea I love it
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
