Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
