just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
