I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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