okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
