so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize