I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
