so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Someone signed my nipple.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
