windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
