Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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