Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
