Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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