it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
