Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
