We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
