What tipped you off? The sombrero?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
