...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
