there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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