She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
