Have you finally orgasmed yet?
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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