it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
