Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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