I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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