How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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