It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
