my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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