I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
