This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
