accomplished twins. life is a go
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Randomize
