Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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