Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
