what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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