Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Green mimosas i think yes
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
you made out with another girl for some wings
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
