I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
