I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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